Pandora’s Paperwork-filled Box

This month’s post might be a little different than usual. Actually, at this point I’m not convinced this isn’t just a form of catharsis (if I write it all down, I can let it go, right? Right?) We’ll see what happens. In reality, I hope this will be more than just my venting about my last few months in paperwork hell. I would actually like for this to serve as a record in case I have to do some of these things again and perhaps also as a guide for anyone else that has to go through these incredibly tedious processes. So, all I can say is buckle up as I endeavor to take you on a journey of a thousand citas (or “appointments”).

Okay, you might at this point be wondering what the heck I’m even talking about in this post. To clarify (and to account for any absenteeism these last few months), Tucker and I have been absolutely elbow-deep in various administrative processes. It all started in January when Canadian immigration (which we applied for back in 2019) contacted us needing updated and additional documentation to continue their processing of our permanent residency status. They needed another “up-front medical exam” and a copy of my renewed passport.

Up-Front Medical Exam

While not the most complicated of our soon-to-be mountain of administrative tasks, getting a medical exam in a foreign country always comes with a few added challenges. For one, Canada requires the exams be performed by one of their IRCC-approved doctors, of which there are only 12 in Mexico. Super unfortunately, none of these twelve happened to be in Guadalajara. However, there was one clinic in Monterrey, which we knew we’d be driving through in February while on another paperwork errand. The next (and probably somewhat obvious) issue with medical exams abroad is the language barrier. I had to call and make our appointments in Spanish and, of course, all the background questions and instructions throughout the exam were also en español. I learned quite a few new words throughout this process (como altura, vejiga, aguja, y radiografía), and I even made a joke about Tucker needing a paleta after his scary, scary blood draw.

Happy to have an excuse to visit Monterrey, honestly

Passport Renewal

The next request from Canada was for my renewed passport information. This was a tricky one because they needed me to renew it 6 months before it expired! When you live abroad your passport is your main ID, so to change it before we renewed our Mexican residency would have been impossible. We also knew we’d be going back to the border in February, so for this one, I actually appealed to Canadian immigration and asked for an extension. I was somewhat successful.

I think they’re just as sick of me at this point…

Mexican Residency Renewal

Truly our 2nd home in GDL

Of course, we also knew that in February our Mexican residency status would also need to be renewed. Everyone who applies for temporary residency in Mexico is given one year at the start, and after those first 365 days, you have the option to renew for 1, 2, or 3 more years. Since getting our initial residency cards was a fairly straight-forward process, I (perhaps) naively thought the renewal process would be even easier. We’re already in the system, no?! However, a series of extremely unfortunate events had us going back and forth to the Immigration Bureau 5 times (often having to wait weeks in between citas due to the new Covid procedures, thanks a lot Omicron). Unfortunately, one of the main reasons for all of these trips was a confusion with my apellidos (“last names”).  

Reimbursement at SAT

In Spanish “apellido” refers to your family name or last name. In Mexico everyone has 2 apellidos – their paternal surname and their maternal surname. My name actually follows this structure pretty well nombre: Danielle, apellido 1: Francuz, apellido 2: Rose. So, when the bank processed my payment that’s how the documents were filled out. However, in the eyes of the US (i.e. in my passport) and thus to the Immigration Bureau, I actually have 2 nombres: Danielle Francuz and 1 apellido: Rose. This discrepancy was a huge one in that I had to pay twice and later file for a reimbursement at yet a different office. I’ve now been to the SAT office (Mexico’s version of the IRS) twice to receive instructions and then my very own Mexican tax ID. I’m now in a “virtual line” for a third appointment where I will need to get my electronic signature before hopefully (finally) getting the reimbursement. Fingers crossed!

Import Permit Re-do

Of course, that wasn’t the only problem we had with the residency renewal…another issue came about because in order to straighten out the name debacle and successfully renew our residency cards within the new Covid procedures, we actually went past our initial residency cards’ expiration dates. Fortunately, the office assured us this wouldn’t be a problem with immigration because everyone was given leniency with the new digital cita process; however, very unfortunately, the Banjercito office (at the US-MX border), which issues import permits for foreign vehicles, did not have the same leniency in place. This meant that while we could remain in Mexico beyond our cards’ expiration dates, our car could not.

Flo, the trouble-maker

For this reason, we had to drive back to the border (before the expiration date) not exactly knowing what we would be able to do without the new residency cards to tie the permit to. Turns out there wasn’t anything we could do. You have to have either a tourist entry or a residency card to get an import permit (both of which were impossible for us as we were in limbo with cards on the verge of expiring and a scheduled appointment in another month). We also couldn’t just drive in Mexico without the permit and/or an expired permit because if we got caught, or when we came back to get a new permit, they could impound the car. Therefore, we opted for door number 3: drive the car across the border, store it for 6 weeks while we get our new residency cards, and fly up at a later date to re-do our permit and drive back down. OMG.

Police Certificates

If that wasn’t enough, while we were dealing with all the chaos of our Mexican residency renewal, Canada asked for MORE documents. With our updated location (i.e. Mexico) we needed to provide a police certificate verifying our legal/non-criminal status in yet another country (they already have these forms from us for the US, Poland, and China). However, completing the background check process in Mexico was yet another new experience for us, and it led us to another new office: the Fiscalía General Del Estado de Jalisco. Here, it took us a scouting mission, a few phone calls (en español), 3 citas, and a trip to another office (for a permission slip of all things) to finally get our fingerprints taken. Although, “fingerprints” is not really the right word. In Mexico, they take prints of your fingers, your palms, and the sides of your hands, it was actually really interesting. I’m also happy to say that I am officially NOT a criminal in Mexico. Tucker’s still waiting on his results…

Passport Renewal (for real this time)

Okay, so now it’s April. We’ve got our renewed residency cards (good until 2025), got our car with its rightful import permit back in GDL. Our appointment to try again for the reimbursement is pending, police certificates are in process, medical exams have been sent to Canada…time to renew my passport (still several months early, but what Canada wants, apparently, Canada gets). Much like all the other processes, this one took me 2 attempts. Forms, photos, payment methods, etc. everything the website says differs from the actual requirements in person, on the day. However, I have now successfully crossed this off my to-do list as well, and the new passport should be shipped sometime in the next 2-5 weeks. Praise be!  

And with that, I think we’re done, or at least very nearly. I do feel a little better getting all of this off my chest. I also feel extremely proud that we were able to juggle various forms of bureaucracy from three different countries all at once. Sometimes I think people see my travel photos and have the idea that Tucker and I are on a perpetual vacation, but I’m here to tell you it isn’t easy to live abroad. Of course, for me, it’s worth absolutely any amount of paperwork! This is my life now. 🙂  

One Year in Mexico – What Have We Learned?

What a year! And what a question! As usual, the time is flying by, and the number of stories, facts, and lessons we’ve accumulated are innumerable. However, I thought it might be fun to share a few of the things that have stuck out this past year as we’ve continued adapting to our new home in Guadalajara, Mexico.

The Lifestyle

One of the first things that is easily recognizable as soon as someone enters Mexico is its vibe. Totally unique and bursting with energy, Mexico (and Guadalajara in particular) had an immediate effect on our mentality. Moving from China back to the US with Canada on the horizon during a global pandemic definitely had us in a more serious mindset. Luckily, only a few days in Mexico had us feeling considerably more relaxed.

More than relaxed actually – tranquilo is the word. The week we arrived in Mexico, I remember walking through a park and watching a man literally stop to smells the flowers. My American go-go-go brain couldn’t compute at first. But that was really all it was. He stopped, smelled the flowers, and went back to his walk. It was the first of many muy tranquilo instances we’ve encountered this year. You can’t help but slow down and ease up, even in a major city like Guadalajara. I have to imagine this year has been significantly better for my blood pressure!  

In addition to feeling more relaxed, we’ve also been re-learning the concept of divertido (fun). One image that will forever be ingrained in my head is that of a man we saw in Ajijic riding a horse down the middle of a road while simultaneously browsing his phone and downing a cerveza. He was definitely having fun. But it’s not just the so-called magic towns that have fun. We live a block away from the party street of GDL, and we hear ALL the fun. I know for some that sounds like a nightmare (light sleepers beware), but for us, it feels like we’re having a party every weekend. Even if we’re just in our PJs watching TV at a comfortable distance.  

Another aspect of our new lives in Mexico has to be living in the moment (o espontáneamente). Sometimes it seems like either something is done right then or else it’ll be “ahorita” (which basically means never). A good example of this would be the “afiladores” or “knife sharpeners”. Every week from our apartment we can hear a whistle and a shout from the afiladores who walk the neighborhood announcing their presence so residents in need can grab their knives and run down for an impromptu sharpening. So far, I’ve yet to attempt this, but maybe ahortia…       

The Lessons 

Of course, adapting to the lifestyle doesn’t happen overnight. We’re basically still fumbling our way through life’s daily routines, making error after error as we go, but for me that’s where all the fun is. The laughs we get from the mistakes we make along with the little annoyances or oddities that give us a window into our own cultural confines definitely make all the ambiguity and confusion worth it.

¿Cajeta o galleta?

Most likely our biggest area of failure revolves around language (as it has in every one of our previous homes abroad). One that is still making us laugh actually occurred in the privacy of our own vehicle on the long drive down. The GPS kept saying we were headed toward Oeste, but neither of us had heard of that city or ever saw it on the map. Turns out “oeste” just means west in Spanish. How had we never learned the cardinal directions? Other language faux pas include my use of the word “cansada” rather than “casada” (“tired” instead of “married”) when asked my civil status, and Tucker’s continual struggle with the pronunciation of “galleta” versus “cajeta” (“cookie” or “caramel”) – for the record, I prefer cajeta.  

Another big lesson (mostly for Tucker) this year has been within the realm of driving. Driving in a foreign country is always challenging, but when you add increased frequency, the lessons just keep on coming. For example, we’ve just about reached our lifetime quota of driving through three-lane roundabouts. Still not always sure the best practices there, though. We’ve also realized that “yielding to flow” is not as easy as it sounds. But my personal favorite has been listening to forgotten 80s hits everywhere we go. The radio stations here absolutely love to play Rasputin, Take On Me, and the like.   

Glorieta de los Niños Héroes – pure chaos
Adiós Tony

Shopping in Mexico has also taught us a few lessons over the past year. We had previously learned that we might be expected to sticker our own produce before checking out (thanks Poland and China), but in Mexico, they thankfully do that at the registers. However, here it’s the bakery and cosmetics sections that are separate in most grocery stores, requiring separate check-outs/payments. We definitely lost a carrot cake in this learning process. Another fun grocery store occurrence is the covering up of any cartoon mascots on food products. There’s a law in Mexico that banned characters like Chester Cheeto and Tony the Tiger in an effort to combat childhood obesity and skewed marketing tactics. When we buy products imported from the US, there’s very often a huge sticker covering up some well-known faces.

Other Surprising Tidbits

In all honesty, every time I write a post like this, it’s hard to choose what to put in and what to save for in-person stories. I usually try to group our experiences in some way, but there are so many things we come across that are really in a world of their own. Things like…

Taco facts. Tacos are a way of life in Mexico, and we’ve learned a lot about how to rate, make, and eat a taco. First of all, two corn tortillas are a must for any self-respecting taco. We’ve heard rumors that in El Norte you can get flour tortillas, but I don’t know, it seems sort of sacrilegious now. Sadly, I also found out that putting crema on your tacos is totally fresa (uppity or snobbish). In fact, the purist tacos should have only 5 things: tortillas, meat, onion, cilantro, and lime. Of course, the final addition to any taco is a good salsa, but I could (and might seriously) write an entire post about salsa in Mexico. 

Another discovery in our early Mexico days was the constant morning cowbells. It reminded us of the “bring out your dead” scene of Monty Python, but in reality, it’s the call of the garbage collectors. There aren’t traditional bins in downtown GDL (and good thing too because the sidewalks are well-trafficked and the sun is warm), so instead of a weekly collection day, each morning the bells are rung, and if you have a full bin, you set your bag outside for collecting as they pass by.

Last but not least, I thought I’d end on a cultural tidbit that I’m not sure if I find cute or creepy. When children lose their teeth in the US, the Tooth Fairy visits their room while they sleep, taking the tooth and leaving some money (also somewhat of a mix between cute and creepy to be honest…). And kids here in Mexico experience a similar swap; however, it’s not a fairy that makes the trade. It’s the Ratón de los Dientes (or the Tooth Mouse). Makes me wonder if Mickey’s got a collection of teeth somewhere in the Kingdom.

Anyway, that’s what we’ve been up to during our first year in Mexico. Picking it all up as we go along and having a ton of fun in the process. We’re currently busy renewing our residencies for an additional 3 years, so I think the learning has only begun! ¡Deseanos suerte!

Hogar dulce hogar ❤

2021 Wrap-up

Another year is coming to an end…and although it wasn’t quite as crazy as 2020, it was close. For me and Tucker there were definitely some things that changed (drastically) and others that were oddly more consistent than ever before; all of which has me reflecting. So, here’s a look back at our 2021: the good, the bad, and the ugly.

In an effort to cleanse ourselves from the craziness of the previous year, we started 2021 by burning everything we could find that said “2020” on it. It was extremely cathartic. As was our drive to Florida’s west coast for sunset followed by a drive to the east coast for the first sunrise of 2021. I enjoyed the dramatic ending of what was objectively one of the worst years in recent history. Although, unfortunately, a lot of what made 2020 so bad seemed to follow us into 2021, I was still extremely happy that I was able to use the New Year as an excuse to move on (mentally and physically as it turned out).

In February we finally said “au revoir” to Quebec (at least for now, accepting the long immigration pause as a bit more permanent than we had originally thought), and then we literally said “goodbye” to Orlando as we packed up and headed out for yet another (different) international move. This time we went south, moving to beautiful Guadalajara, Mexico! With all the new challenges, like obtaining residency, driving across the border, and settling in with a four-legged family member this time, we all felt completely refreshed. It’s amazing what having tangible plans and clear goals can do for your mentality, especially after a year of complete stagnation. I joke that Mexico became my therapist because I had seriously needed something to focus my energy on post-2020, and luckily, I found it.

In addition to giving us a new focus, Mexico has been an incredibly fun experience! In April, Tucker and I celebrated our birthdays with piñatas and cervezas before getting the best birthday presents ever: our vaccines! Getting vaccinated was another sort of turning point for us as we had severely limited our time outside the house prior to the vaccines. Having some sort of protection (in addition to our masks and other precautions) allowed us to begin exploring again. Since we brought our trusty steed (our Ford Focus) down to Mexico, we’ve actually been able to take several road trips thus far: visits to Puerto Vallarta, Aguascalientes, and Querétaro just to name a few.

Of course, we’ve also spent a good amount of the year simply adapting to life in Mexico. We’ve settled into our incredible neighborhood, and like I did with Orlando, I’ve essentially walked as far as I can in every possible direction to really get the feel for where we live (apparently this is my favorite pandemic-induced hobby: neighborhood walks). Another favorite pastime for me this year has been taking a plethora of Spanish classes. With the flexibility of my remote work schedule, I’ve made it a point to really work on my own language learning in 2021. I hope to continue this trend in the New Year as well. As for Tucker, he’s been paying a lot more attention to soccer as of late. We recently watched Atlas (our home team) win a championship, and we have plans to watch them play in person at some point. Fingers crossed!

Go Atlas!

While there have been many changes for us this year, one of the biggest things that hasn’t changed is work. This is the first time in many, many years that Tucker and I both started 2021 with the same jobs that we’re ending it with. Gotta love the remote work life! We’re also happy to report that our international family visits have continued as well without too much difficulty. As always, it has been such an amazing experience to share our new home with our most adventurous family members! During a lull in the variants, Tucker and I even got to continue our international travels by visiting an entirely new (to us) continent with our Thanksgiving trip to Ecuador. I honestly couldn’t be more grateful for that particular spur-of-the-moment decision. Maybe it’ll tide me over for a while…but probably not.

In contrast to all the triumphs, whether new or continued, we’ve also had a few unexpected hurdles this year. International apartment hunting amid a global pandemic was quite a challenge as was the procurement and installation of the most irritating dishwasher known to man. I also had to have a medical procedure done back in September, which not only tested our Spanish, but also our ability to lean into the unknown/ambiguous aspects of living abroad. Thankfully all went well, and I have only great things to say about the healthcare system of Mexico. Another difficulty arose a few months ago when a rogue highway rock hit and cracked our car’s windshield beyond repair. Dealing with car issues and insurance is never fun, but in a foreign country, in another language, it was torturous. However, as I kept reminding myself throughout the mishaps, this is exactly why we love living abroad: new challenges and endless lessons in patience.

As I write this, we’re enjoying the peace and quiet of the days between Christmas and New Year, which brings me to yet another one of the most exciting aspects of our year: celebrating all the holidays! Learning that Cinco de Mayo is mostly an American invention, reliving the events of “Coco” during Día de Muertos, and wishing everyone “Feliz Navidad” this month have all been incredible additions to our collective cultural knowledge. Now I can’t wait to eat my 12 grapes on New Year’s Eve and ring in what I hope will be an even more exciting and transformational year! Here’s to a próspero 2022!

Quarantine Endeavors

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Anything to cure the boredom!

Quarantine, for me, officially started on March 14th, and as a person who was already working remotely, this definitely led to a surplus of down time at home (something I certainly wasn’t used to). The good news is, I can always be counted on to come up with plenty of ideas, projects, games, and the like. See? Being an only-child has its benefits! And now that it seems like this phase might be lasting a bit longer than anyone would have liked, maybe some of you are also in the market for some cheap, interesting at-home entertainment! If so, take a look at my newly documented list of quarantine endeavors: twenty-something random activities, categorized, described, and, of course, photographed for your perusal. Enjoy!

Cooking-related:

brunch
International Brunch

If you know me, you know I absolutely despise cooking, so you might be wondering why I’ve been doing so many cooking-related activities. Well, necessity is the mother of invention, no? We had to cook at home more often, so I thought we might as well have some fun with it, starting with our monthly brunches. At the beginning of 2020, we made a plan to meet my parents for brunch on the first Sunday of every month for as long as we were in Florida. As it turned out, our leaving the country wasn’t the issue…having brunch out was. So, we took the idea to our home tables, creating a theme each month and enjoying the process of cooking together and trying something a little different. Some of our recent themes have included: Disney-inspired brunch, international dishes, and red, white, and blue (for July, of course).

coq au vin'
Oui, oui! C’est délicieux!

We’ve also had our fair share of kitchen-y fun just trying out new (i.e. fancy) dishes like coq au vin and cauliflower rice burrito bowls. More time at home has meant more time to find recipes, meander our way through the cooking process, and really sit down and enjoy our meals. We’ve also made the most of our grocery store visits by conducting various taste tests: classic snack foods, Easter candy, and beef jerky, just to name a few. I mean, a bit of nostalgia mixed in with legitimate research, how could you go wrong? In addition to all the food we’ve been experimenting with, I’ve also taken it upon myself to finally figure out which wines I prefer, and potentially learning to like reds a bit more in the process. We live near a Trader Joe’s, and you just can’t beat Two Buck Chuck!

Game-related:

legos
Destroying it might have been more fun…

I love games even in non-pandemic times, so obviously I have ideas in this category, such as the classic: jigsaw puzzles. I love them, and recently I’ve been intrigued by all the variety there is! 3D puzzles, gradient puzzles, I-Spy puzzles, etc. Tucker and I also had a lot of fun reliving our childhood Lego dreams with a Titanic build, which we then made into a game of “who can make the best ______? Go!” Of course, I probably still gravitate most to board games, thus we’ve recently added Villainous and Sushi Go to our collection. Additionally, we’ve continued putting our own twists on some other classic games (for example, we’ve been known to play Guess Who by choosing two or three people, which makes the questioning much more complicated, especially when we stipulate “no English” – making it a great language practice as well). And speaking of innovation, it’s super fun to make up your own game! Tucker and I still play a version of “Cheyenne, Wyoming”, which is a card game we made up years ago on an overnight layover.

Artistic:

Capture
Striking…lol

One of the things I loved seeing at the beginning of quarantine was all the artistic fun people were having. It started with the artwork challenges where people were imitating famous paintings using what they could find at home. Tucker and I did a few of these, and it was so much fun! Searching galleries for pieces that would work, collecting the props, arranging the set, staging the photo, etc. I’ve also used some of this down time to work on my cross stich and origami skills – getting ready for holiday gift-exchanges already! On a whim, I also ordered a paint-by-numbers kit, and let me tell you, if you’re looking for something that takes up a lot of time, this would be it. Eventually when I finish the thing, I also have big plans for any paint I don’t use: painted rocks for the neighborhood, a Bob Ross video, etc. Time at home really gets the creative juices flowing!

Technology-related:

psychedelic camera
Groovy!

Can we all agree we’re really lucky this happened in 2020 and not 2002 because technology really gives us a lot of options. I don’t think I can have a list of things to do during quarantine without including the ever-popular, binge-watching. So, yeah, find something to watch, make some popcorn, and veg out. I didn’t get into the whole Tiger King thing, but I really loved The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Taskmaster, Russian Doll, and many others. Check out the free site Taste Dive to find shows/books/movies that are similar to your favorites. Also, don’t get hung up in doing the same things online and/or on your phone. I’ve found some really amazing websites and apps just from googling other “things to do when you’re bored/quarantined” lists. Some of my favorites include: Seterra (geography quizzes), Mental Floss (human interest articles), Bored Panda (stories of art and design), Sporcle (trivia), and Free Rice (vocabulary games). Some new apps I’ve had fun with are: 13 tile mahjong, psychedelic camera, photo editors/collage makers, and Hello Talk (social media/language exchange). Since I recently had to get a new phone, I also purposely spent a lot of time optimizing it to my exacting specifications. I tried out all sorts of settings I never would have even looked at before, and I also googled tips/tricks specifically for my phone/system. Tucker even learned a few things for his phone, which he’s had for two years now!

Educational:

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My constant companions…

If you’re starting to feel like maybe you should do something with your at-home time other than just entertain yourself, it might be a great time to focus on learning something specific. I’ve been addicted to Duolingo for while now, but it’s totally guilt-free because my French is seriously improving. I also really enjoyed my 30-day challenges that included something educational (but also easy), like watch a TED Talk every day or read a random country’s entire Wiki page (which coincidentally also helped with my wanderlust). This time is also perfect for catching up on any reading lists you may have. I’ve focused on books I acquired long ago, but never had the time/access to read as well as books that have popped into my mind for one reason or another (such as Jurassic Park – aren’t you curious about how the movie differs from the book? I know I am). I’ve also been enjoying the time I’ve put into some pertinent research. Human rights’ laws, Black history, local election processes, charities, corona-viruses, and so many other things. We’re incredibly lucky to live in the information age where we can learn just about anything we want, including how to reliably fact-check and source information.

Health-related:

One concern I had (even prior to any lock-downs) was how am I going to be as active as I used to be, now that I don’t have to walk to work or traverse the vast, open spaces of China on a daily basis. One way I tried to address this problem was by setting a physical challenge for myself for each month of the year, such as walk 10,000 steps a day (March), 30 minutes of yoga a day (April), etc. Now that I find myself residing in a new neighborhood, I’ve also made a list of “walking tours” for us to complete when we take the dogs out. Just another way to get a bit more exercise and systematically see our neighborhood (and beyond) a little more thoroughly. Of course, I’ve also been dying to organize my things (which are all still in boxes/suitcases), so if you are able to, use some of this at-home time to go through your closets, drawers, even digital files and Marie Kondo your life. Also let me know when you do, so I can live vicariously through you! Finally, another health-related activity I’ve been working on is finishing up any/all beauty products I have. I came back from China with heaps of hydrating face masks, and I love throwing one on and simultaneously finishing up that tanning lotion I got way back in 2016 (at long last!).

walking
Luckily Orlando is a really nice place to walk!

Miscellaneous:

Tucker bday
Birthday Boy

Finally, we all need to be reminded that while we might be limiting our face-to-face time, we should still be connecting with family and friends. This is the perfect time to develop new habits of regular phone calls, video chats, game nights, etc. We should definitely all keep celebrating special events too! Birthdays, anniversaries, successfully submitting your tax returns, whatever you want! Tucker and I just celebrated Christmas in July last weekend and had so much fun. I actually think eggnog tastes better in the summer. Also, even though it’s tough to do, try to keep planning. Trust me, I really know the frustration of trying to plan during a pandemic (I’m still technically mid-move), but it really feels good to talk about the possibilities, even if they end up changing. And one last one: write something! Write a postcard or a letter, start a bullet-journal, take up blogging or poetry. It can really be quite cathartic.

So that’s my list. I hope it gave you an idea or two or maybe it sparked something completely different. This really is the perfect time to try something new and perhaps change some habits in the process. I also feel like having these small, solid “events” to look forward to have really helped keep me sane in this time of unknowns. It’s definitely been an interesting phase in our lives, but there’s certainly no reason it can’t be a fun one as well. I can’t wait to look back on quarantine and reminisce about all the crazy things we did and tried! See you on the other side!

this too shall pass
And it will

Ruminating on Returning

With so much to see in the world (and currently so much time to plan) Tucker and I find ourselves talking about trips we’d like to take fairly often. We typically have no problem jumping into the logistics and research of a given location, but we do sometimes get stuck on the initial “where should we go” question. There are so many places we’d absolutely love to visit, but there is also a growing list of places we’d really like to return to; places we clearly haven’t explored thoroughly enough for our liking; places, including but not limited to:

The Netherlands

472549_4075793461494_1409717026_oThis was an obvious choice for this particular list because we only spent about 23 hours in the country. It was our first foray into long-layover travel, and we definitely fumbled our way through it. It wasn’t too difficult to get from the airport to the city center (and back again), but as we set off with absolutely no plan, it was mostly just a long walk around the beautiful canals. Amsterdam is a great walking city though, so even with our random ambling, we were able to take in the numerous and iconic bridges, bicycles, and fry-stands. We also explored the infamous Red Light District and (from a distance) the I AMsterdam sign, which is sadly no longer there.

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Pre-smartphone days

If/when we return, however, there many things we have added to our NL itinerary. Mostly notably, all the incredible museums that we missed! Anne Frank, Van Gogh, Rembrandt – we definitely needed more time. I also want to visit Castle De Haar, see the tulips, and maybe spend the night in a houseboat. We’ll also need to do a better job of trying some Dutch specialties on our next trip: poffertjes (small fluffy pancakes), bitterballen (fried meat balls), and some fresh Gouda, for a start.

Finland

414107_4076007586847_1513337318_oNext on our “must return to” list is Finland, which might not have been an obvious choice seeing as we spent almost three weeks there, but at the time we 1) had very little money to spend, 2) were exhausted from finishing up our undergrad degrees, and 3) had just gotten married, which as anyone who has planned a wedding can attest, left us feeling a bit burnt out. Typically when we travel now, we avoid suitcases and we move around a lot, but as this was our first trip sans car, we failed miserably at both packing lightly and at utilizing public transportation. We also weren’t able to afford train passes or much of anything at that time; in fact, our flights and accommodations were wrangled together with the help of some of our wedding gifts and useful family connections. Regardless of what now seems like a trip very far removed from our usual preferences, at the time is was magical.

It was actually my first trip overseas, and I quite literally cried on the plane from sheer excitement. Even with very little planning and even less travel experience, we found time to act our age in a youth hostel in the Olympic Stadium of Helsinki; we then honeymooned properly in a cabin (with its very own sauna) at a lakeside resort in Kajaani, and we also watched a series of bizarre sunsets around 11pm each night. I really wouldn’t change anything about our time in Finland, but for the next visit, I do have a list of a few more things I’d like to see/do. Things like: cross into the Arctic Circle, see the Northern Lights, meet Santa Claus, go snowshoeing, step foot in Turku, and visit Olavinlinna Castle, all while listening to my favorite language in the world: suomen.

The Bahamas

536438_10200935610700815_1786181392_nTechnically we’ve been to the Bahamas a few times now, but does it really count if it’s on a cruise? I mean, don’t get me wrong, cruises are fun and economical, but they definitely keep you in a bit of a bubble. For this reason, I would love to go back to the Bahamas, without the big boat. I think it would be amazing to fly into Nassau and explore New Providence Island a little more slowly and a lot more thoroughly. There are several forts I want to see on the island, not to mention the art galleries, lighthouses, and, of course, the beaches (especially the ones on the far side of the island). At some point Tucker and I want to get our diving certification so we can explore the depths too, or if we don’t have time for that, then I want to do one of those bubble helmet dives instead!

South Korea

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Chimek

Another clear case of not enough time: our quick trip to South Korea still feels like a bit of a blur. I had just spent a month studying abroad in China, but before taking the long plane ride back to the US, Tucker and I tacked on a few days in Seoul as well. Luckily we had our very own personal tour guide as a former student of mine (and his wife) took us around the city showing us all the famous sights and, more importantly, the best eats. We tried to act cool in Gangnam, we saw the famous Blue House, we crisscrossed the many bridges and marveled at the surrounding mountains. We were also treated to the most amazing Korean BBQ, bingsu (shaved ice dessert), chimek (fried chicken and beer), and soju (traditional Korean alcohol), which fueled our love of gochujang (red chili paste) for years to come. It was truly unlike any trip we’d ever taken, and spending the time with new friends was the best part.

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Thanks Hyung-Bin and Jessica!

Of course, with so little time (and a tightly packed and carefully arranged agenda), we didn’t really even make it out of the capital. Next time, we’d love to see the notorious DMZ or to head south to the highly regarded Jeju Island. I find that a lot of my Korean students speak very fondly of the nature in their home country, and I’d love to hike a mountain, view a waterfall, or whatever else is going on in the season we find ourselves in. I’m also pretty sure I’ll never get my fill of Korean food, so obviously we need more time and access on that front. I know we didn’t even try half of what was on our list, and everything we did try, we mostly certainly want to have again!

Italy

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So sick 😦

Does anyone feel like they’ve ever seen enough of Italy? I feel like even Italians are always discovering new things they want to do and see in a country that clearly has culture coming out of every orifice. Speaking of orifices, mine were a bit sneeze-y, stuffy, and runny when we took our trip to Rome a few years ago. It was actually a bit heartbreaking to not be able to fully taste what many people regard as the king of international cuisines. Due to my weakened state and a surprise address from the Pope that weekend, we weren’t able to check off quite as many things as we’d hoped in planning that particular trip. Fortunately, we did still hit most of the highlights of the Eternal City, plus we got to see the Pope pop his head out of the little carpeted window in the Vatican, so how can I really complain?

For Rome specifically though, I know we need to see the Sistine Chapel and the rest of the Vatican Museums (when we were there, the wait to go inside was over 4 hours long). We also opted not to go into the Colosseum when we were there, partly because of crowds but also because it just looked so touristy. In hindsight, we regret not taking a closer look at such a historic structure. And then, there’s the rest of Italy we still need to explore: the fashion of Milan, the waterways of Venice, the architecture of Pisa, the art of Florence, the pizza of Naples; I mean really, there is so so much we still have to see in Italy. I also want to have a clear nose and a few more cannoli taste-tests next time.

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Waiting to hear Pope Francis

Germany

13726595_10210193233855608_8528054797553861878_nGermany unfortunately represents another set of rookie moves on our part. We spent a year living just a few hours over the border in central Poland, yet we failed to A) make it to Oktoberfest and B) visit Bavaria, the most quintessential of all the German regions. While I do sorely regret not making time for southern Germany, we did really enjoy our time in Berlin and Potsdam looking at the incredible architecture, sampling the infamous brews, and picnicking in the numerous parks. It was an absolutely lovely time, but of course, I’d love to go back for a festival or two. It’s really not our fault we missed Oktoberfest; we had wrongly assumed it took place in October, but really it’s more of a September event that actually ends in early October. Ah well, it’s on the list for our inevitable return trip. As are other famous places like: Neuschwanstein Castle, the Rhine, Cologne, and, of course, Bavaria.

Mongolia

22489965_10214825998711834_2745602979160999147_nPerhaps unlike any other place we had been, Mongolia intrigued us in so many ways. It’s really a breathtakingly beautiful country that exceeded every expectation we had for it. We visited for about a week in 2017, but unfortunately a lot of that time was taken up by work (conferences, presentations, etc.) In our free time though, we were able to pretty thoroughly explore Ulaanbaatar, including temples, yurt neighborhoods, live-music bars, and amazingly trendy restaurants. We also took a short road trip out to Gorkhi-Terelj National Park, which was honestly a bit frightening for me (mostly because we opted to dismiss the rental insurance), but ultimately it gave us the best glimpse of what life is like outside UB.

It was this glimpse that sparked our conversations of returning to Mongolia. We’d love to experience more of the steppes, perhaps to try our hand at some serious horseback riding, yurt living, and other nomadic fundamentals. I’m also really eager to return to Mongolia in the dead of winter because Ulaanbaatar is consistently ranked the world’s coldest capital, and that’s something I want to experience. Although, on the flip side, I also want to make the long trek out to the Gobi dessert or the Flaming Cliffs; as one of the least densely populated countries in the world, the nature in the Land of Eternal Blue Sky is unspoiled and absolutely stunning. Okay, so apparently we need two or three more trips to Mongolia.

Malaysia

51666025_10218814551103151_7277803769331449856_nLast on this list (for now) is a place we actually visited just last year. On our way back to China from a work event in the Philippines, we took a bit of a roundabout path that allowed us to spend almost a week in Malaysia, well, in and around Kuala Lumpur anyway. Malaysia is a tricky country to fully explore in a short amount of time because it’s made up of part of a peninsula (West Malaysia) and part of the island of Borneo (East Malaysia), the two regions being about 400 miles apart. For this reason, although we feel pretty good about our exploration of the amazing capital city, typically called KL for short, we still really want to explore some of the other regions of this incredibly diverse country.

51743204_10218802008229587_1851030617089638400_nWe never made it to a beach while we were in Malaysia, so maybe we’ll start there on a subsequent trip. There are many islands off the coasts of both West and East Malaysia that look amazingly beautiful and relaxing. There are also several world-renowned national parks, which are home to a collection of unique indigenous species that Tucker really wants to check out. Of course, as we found in KL, Malaysia seems to enjoy extremes sports as well, so maybe we’ll try the popular zip-lining, white water rafting, or jungle trekking activities while we’re at it!

65967210_10219977305371281_6241891798231285760_nOf course, there are three countries, not previously mentioned, that are and will indefinitely be on our return radar: the United States, Poland, and China. These are the places we have the greatest connection to, and thus will need many re-visits and reunions to sustain us. Luckily, our friends and family in Chicago, Atlanta, Orlando, Łódź, Hefei, and Shanghai continue to make us feel like we never left. Traveling around the world and learning about different cultures and languages has been a huge part of my life, and I sincerely hope it always will be. Whether we make it back to any of these places, or onto any of the other 150+ countries still on my list, I’ll forever be grateful for these opportunities and the people who have had a hand in making them happen.

30 Lessons I’ve Learned in My 30 Years

1This month I turned 30, which of course has me reflecting. Reflecting on the now three decades of life I’ve lived, and perhaps more importantly, on the three decades of lessons I’ve learned. I truly feel I learn something each and every day, and sometimes these lessons are what I consider to be “life lessons”, nuggets of advice that I try to take with me and live by, not just in the moments that test me, but throughout all the moments I’ve been given.

Of course, this can be tricky to do – there’s a lot to process in our daily lives, and it can be hard to focus on keeping the things we’ve learned front and center. For this reason, for my 30th birthday, I’ve listed out 30 things (in no particular order) that I personally try to remember and further infuse into each of my currently 15 million+ minutes of life.

You can always learn something. At any time, from any person, in any situation, there is always a way to learn and grow.

3Ask questions. One of the best ways I know to learn and grow is by asking questions. I used to be embarrassed to be the person who always had a question or two, but now I realize how valuable questions can truly be for our own understanding and for others’.

Try everything. Now I just think of the Zootopia song, but honestly, it’s great advice: try anything and everything. Always be open to new things because you never know what you might discover.

Experience and wisdom are not necessarily age-based. We have a tendency to believe that our added years bring us wisdom, and while for many of us it feels that way as we continue to progress through our lives, I don’t think age and experience/wisdom are mutually inclusive. It’s important to remember that each person brings their own unique experience and wisdom to the table, and that respect should have no age limit.

6There will always be someone _________ (insert comparative adjective here) than you. It’s no use chasing labels like “the best _______” or “the most _________” because somewhere out there someone will burst that bubble. We really shouldn’t compare ourselves because we’re just not the same.

Live your own life. Speaking of not comparing, our lives and choices should also go on without any rivals. We commonly talk about the detriment social media has on this regard, but keeping up with the Jones’ isn’t a new concept, and it has never been healthy.

Work to live don’t live to work. Somewhat morbidly, I like to read what people say about their lives when they’re close to the end, and one of the most common threads is that “work took up too much time, focus, and energy”. We need to work, but our work days aren’t what we’ll look back on in the end.

10Find things that make you happy and do them often. So when you’re not working, find and do things that you like. Enjoy your hobby, spend time with people you love, take trips, do all the things!

Keep moving forward; always have a goal. Possibly the opposite problem of living just to work, is living without a purpose or goal. It’s never easy to decide in which direction to go, but having any direction at all can often spur the most incredible, unexpected opportunities.

We are our own captains driving this ship. I heard this in a yoga class once, and while it was true in the moment (on a physical/exercise-based level), it’s also true in the grand scheme of life. We get to choose so many things for ourselves day in and day out. Make those decisions count.

Home is what you make it. Another very personal lesson for me after years of having a not-so-traditional “home”. I’m not exactly sure I’ll ever settle on “where” my home is, but I’ve found that the place itself is not important at all. Who you’re with, what you do with your time and space, this is what makes a place feel like home.

16Stay positive. Especially right now, it can seem impossible to see the glass as half-full, but there’s always a silver lining and “happiness can be found even in the darkest of places” if you keep looking. Staying positive not only helps us get through tough times, but it allows us to move forward with hope for a better future.

Complaining doesn’t change anything. Shockingly, complaining won’t help solve any problems, and, in fact, it might actually make you feel worse. Ignore the impulse and skip ahead to the possible solutions or mindset changes that are needed instead.

Think first, act second. The human existence version of “measure twice, cut once”. Our actions can have drastic consequences, so we better be sure to act only after conscious consideration.

18Some things don’t need to be said. Together with thinking before acting, we should definitely also think before speaking. I’ve had to edit a lot of papers in my day, so I’ve learned the art of reticence. I really love the proverb: “Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates. Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?”

Focus on doing good/being good. We love wholesome memes and feel-good stories, so we should work on being a part of them ourselves. How can we actively do more good? Imagine how much more good there would be in the world if we all worked on this!

Believe in something. Whether it’s your faith, your passion, or even yourself, having something (or some things) to believe in can really help narrow down your goals, choices, behaviors, etc.

20People are more alike than different. Another truth that makes itself known to me every day is that we are all more alike than different. It’s fun to share and learn from our little differences, like customs, slang, preferences, etc. But ultimately, we’re all human, and we’re so much better off together.

Empathy defines us as human. As with most virtues, we can choose which ones to cultivate and bring into greater focus, and for me, empathy is one I would very much like to continue striving for. In our individualistic society, it’s so easy to say “everyone for themselves”, but that is the very last thing I want for our collective future.

Try to build a longer table not a taller fence. Another great quote that I try to live by. Our connection and cooperation bring us together and strengthen our bonds like nothing else. We’re truly all in this together.

21Awareness and open-mindedness are necessary for growth. We simply cannot hope to improve or progress without awareness and open-minded thinking. It can at times feel uncomfortable or strange, but the end results can be truly life-changing.

Embrace and then learn from your mistakes. Easy to say, tough to do, but so useful if it can be managed. We often tell our kids “mistakes are how you learn”, so let’s take our own advice for once!

Don’t dwell on hindsight. Another task that seems easy until you actually try it. Everything looks so different in hindsight, but we can’t get caught up in the “shoulda, coulda, woulda”. It’s impossible to go back and do it again, so do the best you can in the moment and then pull an Elsa and let it go.

Patience is a virtue (and at times an absolute lifesaver). The more we can work on this particular skill, the happier we’ll all be. Trust me patience is precious.

22Be thankful and reflect on how/why. We all know we should be grateful for what we’ve been given in this life. It could always be worse, after all. Gratitude can really give us that big picture perspective and prompt so many other positive thoughts and actions in our lives.

Perception is everything. We each see the world a little differently, and it’s important to always keep that in mind. The media isn’t the only one with bias; we each have our biases and filters, and we should be aware and thoughtful of our own and others’ perspectives.

Change is inevitable; flexibility is gift. Most people don’t like change (and while I typically thrive in it) sometimes I find myself rejecting change as much as the next person. Unfortunately as much as we might not want things to change, they undoubtedly will. Best adapt a strategy sooner rather than later!

25Not always having the answer is freeing. I have a motto: embrace ambiguity. It’s healthy to not have all the answers, and even healthier to recognize that we don’t.

Drink more water. Just do it; you won’t regret it.

Don’t be afraid to share. Contribute, participate, commiserate, teach, post, whatever! We all have something valuable to add to this world, so let’s do that.

I’m happy to be able to share my lessons with whoever is interested enough to read this, and I’d love to hear some of your most important life lessons. What did you learn in your first thirty years or even in the last thirty days? What do you try to work into your everyday thoughts and actions? We’ve got lots of time to reflect, and with all the people out there, the amount of lessons we can learn from each other is limitless!

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Florida Adventures

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Contemplating the state of the world

Have I already mentioned what an interesting year 2020 is turning out to be…well, anyway, as you may have heard, we should all be self-quarantining now. So what better time is there to write about all the adventures we had (and some we still have) planned for our sojourn in Florida, which has also been quite unexpected and rife with issues (more on that in a later, much longer post).

For now, let’s focus on Florida: the Sunshine State, the Family Vacation Mecca, the Hotbox of the East Coast. Of course, like most middle-class Americans east of the Mississippi, Tucker and I had been to Florida many times in our lives. Apparently my first ocean experience was as a two month old at New Port Richey Beach; Tucker and I both visited grandparents down here when we were little (mine in St. Pete and his in Fort Pierce), and of course, if you know my family, you know we’ve made our fair share of trips to the big WDW. We actually both remember separate trips to Pensacola for one reason or another, and as I have family in the Villages, we’ve made several stops there as well. But, when my parents officially moved down here back in 2017, Tucker and I planned and took a trip to Fort Lauderdale, Miami, and Key West (with his mom this time), which I believe truly marked the beginning of our new and focused Florida Explorations.

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Sunset Key

So, when we came back this year, knowing immigration would take a few months, we decided to really see what Florida has to offer. I made a list, shocking I know, and we’ve done our best amid the global and domestic catastrophes to explore our new state of temporary residency. Here’s what we’ve done:

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Butter beer!

1 – Universal Studios

The first place I knew had to be on the list was Universal Studios. Tucker had never been, and the last time I was here was in 2006 with a friend and her family. Since then, they’ve added pretty much the only thing that could draw me away from Disney and into another over-priced theme park: The Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Long story short, it’s no Disney, but you really can’t miss visiting Hogwarts and Diagon Alley, can you?

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So amazing!

2 – Daytona Beach

We realized pretty early on in our Florida-life that everything in the state is between 1-3 hours away from Orlando, so it was easy to plan Saturday excursions in any direction. One of the first of such excursions was to Daytona Beach, which boasts the title of “The World’s Most Famous Beach”. And while I might not go that far, it’s always great fun to share a fishbowl drink overlooking the waves.

3 – Disney Brunches

Some of the things on our list are events rather than places, as with our plan to go to brunch with family on the first Sunday of each month we are in Florida. This was narrowed down to Disney-specific brunches because my parents get a discount and, well, we love the World. So far we’ve been to Chef Art Smith’s Homecomin’, Boma – Flavors of Africa, and the Whispering Canyon Cafe. Next up was going to be the Wave…of American Flavors, but I think April’s brunch might be an at-home affair.

4 – Cocoa Beach and the Space Coast

82989356_10221868133720808_9032252941439860736_nNext up, my dad wanted to try a famous seafood place (Dixie Crossroads) out on the Atlantic coast, which I quickly paired up with a drive to Cocoa Beach and Port Canaveral. Although it was a quick visit, we walked along the beach and the pier, looked for the cruise ships and the Space Center, and learned that Florida has a nickname for every single section of coastline.

5 – Crystal River Manatees

Of course, I had to include Florida’s friendliest sea creature in our excursions! Tucker and I took a drive up to Crystal River National Wildlife Refuge to see some free range manatees and were blown away by the large numbers of them. While they definitely kept their distance, and rightly so, it was incredible to watch them splash and float around in adorable aggregations (which I learned is the group noun for manatees).

6 – Downtown Orlando

Just as I spent a lot of time exploring Atlanta when we lived there, I knew I wanted to go through the different neighborhoods and attractions of Orlando as well, you know, aside from the theme parks. One day we took a lovely walk around Eola Lake and up around Church Street. We went to see Henry IV at Orlando Shakes and strolled around all the museums on the north side. We’ve also found our new favorite used bookstore in Best Used Books and have been back and forth to all sorts of Orlando hot spots since January.

7 – Hop Passport: Florida Edition89925318_10222367882414213_2624685322386014208_n

Actually, one of the main reasons we’ve been to so many random locations in Florida is due to our quest to get a stamp at as many local breweries as possible. My sister-in-law and her boyfriend gave us the amazing Hop Passport for Christmas this year, and we’ve had a great time checking off places and seeing new cities across Florida. We’re at 14 out of 96 so far, and you should definitely check out the Hop Passport for your state if you’re also a beer-lover. You just can’t beat half-off beers!

8 – Disney (free things)

Another more open-ended item on our list is to finally do some of the free things at Disney that we never had the time or energy to do on previous trips. We haven’t bought park tickets for our time in Florida this year, but we’ve had a great time attending free events, walking the Boardwalk, hanging out at Disney Springs (the free shopping and entertainment area), and so much more. If you want a list of fun, free, and non-kiddie things to do at Disney, please let me know. I’m practically an expert.

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The Boardwalk: my favorite Disney place!

9 – Saint Augustine

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Castillo de San Marcos

Finally, on our last day of freedom (pre-self-quarentine), Tucker and I drove up to Saint Augustine to learn a bit more about Florida’s very long history. We visited the Fountain of Youth, the Colonial Quarter, the oldest masonry fort in the US, and ultimately saw a completely different side to this seriously diverse state. I’d really love to go back and explore Saint Augustine even more one day; it’s really an awesome city.

And so that brings me to a few things still on our list for the oh-so-tentative future:

* Take a train

I absolutely love trains, and when I saw how frequently they’re actually used in Florida (albeit still over-priced and not terribly convenient), I knew I needed to try them out for myself. Probably after the pandemic though…

Train

* Naples/Everglades

The Naples area is deemed “Paradise Coast” and it’s one part of Florida neither of us have ever been to; therefore, it was an obvious choice for the list. We’ve also never truly been into Everglades National Park (we’ve only driven through parts of it), so we tacked that (and the obligatory airboat ride that accompanies it) on as well.

* Devil’s Den

A place that has been on my travel to-do list for years now, Devil’s Den is an underground spring with clear waters and an abundance of ancient rock formations and fossils. It looks so cool, and I really want to go! Once the water gets a bit warmer though…

Den

* Tampa/deep sea fishing

And for now, the last thing on our list is a trip over to the Gulf Coast for a deep-sea fishing excursion (during which I might just have to close my eyes or ask that we be allowed to catch and release). We’re also planning to do a more thorough exploration of downtown Tampa on this particular trip. I really love the whole two birds, one stone idea.

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Making lemonade!

Well, that’s our Florida bucket list! Fingers crossed that everyone stays home for the next few weeks/months, so we can get back to exploring once everyone’s healthy again. Until then, I might add a few more things to list now that I have such ample time for research! I also challenge everyone reading this to do the same for your state/region – it’s a great way to pass the time and make the most of our days in the future!

A Year of 30 Day Challenges

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Happy New Year!

It’s January! A new year, a new decade even, which typically means resolution-making and goal-setting. I, personally, love this time of year because 1) I much prefer beginnings to endings and 2) I like a good challenge. This year I’m doing things a little differently though. Rather than setting my usual collection of resolutions (and promptly forgetting about them a few weeks in), I’m focusing on 30 Day Challenges instead. Each month I’ve set two challenges for myself (one mental and one physical) that I’m going to attempt to do every day for 30 days.

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In the words of Rocky, “you owe yourself.”

They say you have to do something for at least three weeks for it to become a habit, so perhaps I’m looking at this as a way to develop 24 good habits. Of course, I doubt they’ll all stick, and honestly, as I’m typing this, I’ve already had a slight lapse in one of my challenges. Haha! But I’m not really too concerned about that. I don’t see resolutions or goals as something that I can fail at. For me, it’s just a way to bring new things to my attention every day, which might turn into something lasting or might not. The worst that happens is I bettered myself for a few days rather than not at all.

IMG_9783You may have already heard about 30 Day Challenges. I first heard about them from Matt Cutts’ TED Talk (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzRvMsrnoF8 ). I really like the idea because it allows me to set several shorter goals that can easily build into something bigger. For example, I’d really just like to get into the habit of exercising in some way every day, but in the past, when I have left a goal vague like that, it always feels much more difficult to accomplish. This way I’m able to set mini-goals that will actually lead into the larger ones naturally. I’m basically tricking myself. Lol.

Anyway, for inspiration (or maybe just for entertainment) here is the list of 30 Day Challenges I created for myself, and if you are interested in creating your own set of challenges, here are some other lists I have perused for ideas: https://www.mindfulproductivityblog.com/blog/101-30-day-self-care-challenge-ideas and https://www.developgoodhabits.com/30-day-challenge-ideas/.

-January: read at least one news article every day AND stretch for 15 minutes every day

-February: research a specific country/culture every day AND floss my teeth every day

-March- watch a documentary every day AND walk 10,000 steps every day

-April- learn a new word every day AND do yoga for 30 minutes every day

-May- listen to a new song every day AND eat vegetarian for a month

-June- complete a French lesson every day AND improve my posture every day

-July- meditate for 10 minutes every day AND do 50 sit-ups every day

-August- do a brain-training exercise every day AND do 25 push-ups every day

-September- check email/social media only once per day AND do 50 squats every day

-October- draw a picture every day AND dance for 30 minutes every day

-November- write a book in a month AND eat no processed foods for a month

-December- learn to waltz in a month AND drink 8 glasses of water every day

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Everyone loves stickers!

Of course, the act of accomplishing these tasks every day is a reward in and of itself, but in order to really track my progress and reward myself for even remembering (let alone completing) the challenges each day, I reverted back to elementary school and created a little sticker chart for myself. You might feel like printing a tiny calendar and remembering to put the stickers on every day is another task to add to your list, but for me, it’s fun and a good use of all these random stickers I have saved up! Regardless of your choice of reward, I think it’s a good idea to recognize the little accomplishments you’re making every day or every month towards whatever challenges or goals you have set. I mean, who couldn’t use a few more gold stars in their life, right?

Whether you have made resolutions, plan to give a 30 Day Challenge a shot, or just want to make it through another year in one piece, I wish you the best of luck in 2020! Happy New Year!

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Bring it on 2020!

Viva La Mexico

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Chichen Itza

Another month, another amazing country explored! Have I mentioned how nice it’s been working entirely online? No, but seriously, we’re incredibly lucky to be able to support these explorations as Tucker and I continue to make plans for what we want to do and where we want to be in the future. For the past 30 days, we’ve been in Mexico, sussing out the situation in three amazing cities, and learning all we could in the process. When planning our Mexican adventure (while happily freezing in Canada), we narrowed our focus down to Merida, Guadalajara, and Mexico City. Through online research and word of mouth, we felt that these were the three most likely candidates for a potential future home that fits our particular set of needs/wishes. So we set out to see which city would reign supreme (in our eyes anyways). Of course, we were also very interested in what living in Mexico would be like in general, having never visited any part of Latin America, and also how much tourism we could possibly squeeze into this already packed month of international inquiries! Here’s what we learned:

Merida

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Our first stop was the city of Merida, which is the capital city of the Yucatan peninsula. We arrived fairly late at night and were quite surprised when the first restaurant we came face-to-face with in Mexico was a Carl’s Jr. Haha! From that moment on, we were constantly reminded how much the US and Mexico have influenced each other over the years. From the abundance of Coke products to the variety of Christmas songs, there were so many things that made us feel like we weren’t too far from home. Some things, however, were very different. For example, the colors of Merida were unlike any city I’ve ever been to! Every building was painted a different, yet equally vibrant shade: coral, sea foam, cyan, olive; I lost count early on. All the color was even more surprising when we learned that Merida’s nickname is “the White City”! Apparently that has more to do with the traditional clothing than a description of the city itself, because Merida is nothing if not colorful.

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Pure art!

Merida was also incredibly clean! Everywhere we walked we could smell the scents of soap or laundry detergent wafting out of the various doorways. I had also (wrongly) assumed that in such a warm climate, bugs would be imminent, but we saw none during our 10 days on the peninsula. We what did find was a lot of extremely helpful strangers. As we stood in front of famous buildings or walked back and forth trying to find the correct bus stop, so many people approached us and gave us advice and information. We learned a lot about the Mayan people from locals who kindly shared what they knew in English, just for us. They didn’t ask for tips or for us to buy something from them, they shared because they’re proud of their heritage and wanted foreigners to also soak up some of their history and culture. Overall, Merida was incredibly laid-back, absolutely unique, and unequivocally friendly.

Guadalajara

74469092_10221331106775470_6605481842357305344_nOur next stop was Guadalajara, the capital city of Jalisco (I’m really beginning to think I must have a thing for capital cities…). Anyway, when we arrived in this, larger city, I realized just how much all the negative hearsay (like the number of well-meaning warnings I received before our trip) can really affect first-time travelers. I immediately felt uneasy, like everything was an unforeseen danger. Of course, after only a few hours, that was all wiped away. The people of Guadalajara were just as friendly and carefree as those in Merida. Our Uber drivers, especially, greeted us and patiently listened as we stumbled through Spanish to ask questions or give any necessary additional information. We also noticed that in Guadalajara, and perhaps Mexico as a whole, the timings of things are quite flexible. We often found ourselves checking the hours of one place or another, only to arrive and see they haven’t quite set up yet (even a few hours after opening). We really felt the struggle of coming from a China mindset (up early, asleep by 10pm) to the Mexican way of life, where nothing really gets going until after 8pm at least!

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Arco de Zapopan

Once it gets going though, it’s impossible to deny the liveliness of Mexcio! Guadalajara in particular has an amazing bar/restaurant street that has so much activity it would take more than a year to see and do everything just on that one strip! From festivals and live music to pub crawls and lucha libre tours, the people in the city know how to party (even on weeknights, which was incredibly impressive, and something I wasn’t quite able to do). While in the city, I was also surprised by the extreme variety of Mexican cuisine. I love Mexican food in the US, but what we typically see is a list of the same 5-6 items with various customization options. In Mexico, the food-scene is much more diverse. From the taco stands and torta kiosks to traditional Aztec/Mayan dishes that look like they came right out of a Top Chef episode (not to mention all the international options). In 30 days I’ve added countless new dishes to my favorites list, and I can now be absolutely sure that Mexican is my favorite of the world’s cuisines. Of course, my favorite among favorites is still the humble taco, and I feel no shame in admitting that Tucker and I kept track of the 75 tacos we ate in Mexico!

Mexico City

78976206_10221463131596008_7786060591298248704_nOur final stop on this scouting mission was the infamous Mexico City. One of the largest cities in Latin America with about 9 million residents, and easily one of the most welcoming mega-cities I’ve ever been in. Sometimes in cities of this size, the expectations for speed and efficiency can be extremely high, which poses a problem for travelers who are clueless as to how things are usually done. However, I never felt any impatience from the locals in CDMX (Ciudad de Mexico). Things were just as easy-going and friendly as the other cities we visited. Of course, Mexico City is quite big, which does bring about some challenges. For example, it typically took over an hour to get from one side of the city to the other, even with the super convenient (and cheap) metro. A sprawling city combined with loads of commuters, holiday shoppers, and tourists definitely made for a chaotic transportation situation. However, because of that large and diverse group, we were also able to get some Kansas City BBQ when we wanted something a bit different one night. It’s the eternal struggle of city life!

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Busy, busy!

Aside from the sheer size and diversity Mexico City (and really all of Mexico) has to offer, I was also really surprised by the openness we saw and felt. Mexico is a Catholic country, and having lived in Poland, I remember the conservative lean that often goes along with that. However, Mexico proved again and again that if it’s not bothering anyone, who cares? We immediately noticed all the pda (public displays of affection): lots of kissing, hand holding, etc. anywhere and everywhere, by all sorts of couples: old, young, gay, straight. We also saw more skin than we had grown used to in China (although that is pretty much necessary when it’s still in the 80’s in winter). And finally, the language used was a bit freer as well. I’ve never seen so many kids shouting curse words as when we went to the lucha libre match (all in good fun though). Ultimately, Mexico had the “anything goes” approach that we sometimes found in China and Poland, but here it was definitely more strongly connected to social issues, and we ultimately found it very refreshing.

Mexico In General

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Incredibly lush!

As I’m writing this, I keep thinking of things I want to add. All the information we got in Merida about the Mayan people and the way it influences the modern culture there, all the flowers and fruits of Jalisco that surrounded us even in the middle of a huge city, and all the people in Mexico City, who just like in NYC are trying to make it big in one way or another. As is typical when we travel, we learned so much about the places and people around us, but we also learned more about ourselves: like how strong preconceived notions can be (even in experienced travelers), how many American exports are actually really unhealthy (sugary drinks and fast food), and ultimately, how similar we all really are. We often found ourselves bonding in limited language over traffic, wifi, cute animals, and delicious food: you know, the important things in life.

In short, Mexico was absolutely amazing, and we could definitely see ourselves living there in the future! We felt safe and welcomed, and we had a great time getting to know our southern neighbors a bit better. As it stands now, we’re muddling our way through Canadian immigration, but at least we now have a solid plan B (Guadalajara won out, by the way). Or, who knows, maybe after a few years in the frigid north, the desire to thaw out in Mexico will draw us south of the border sooner than we think!

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America in Ten Words

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One Cool American

Earlier this year I read China in Ten Words by Hua Yu, which I would highly recommend! It’s a short collection of personal stories centered around ten words that the author feels represent China and its history, people, culture, etc. As someone who (at the time) was living in China and had spent the previous two years learning all about said culture, I absolutely loved reading from the perspective of Yu, a native Chinese. He touched on so many of the things I have shared in my various posts and gave new meaning to some of the things Tucker and I experienced ourselves as residents in China. In short, I loved it so much that I thought maybe I could join Yu in sharing a bit about my own culture or at least how I, one American, view it.

Honestly, this is a slight departure for me because I typically choose to write about my discoveries and observations on places and cultures that I am newly discovering myself, but this required a different sort of reflection. Even though I definitely can’t live up to Hua Yu’s work with one short blog post, I hope to share a few of the traits and characteristics (in no particular order) that, for me, make America, America.

#1 Independent

IndependentAs an English teacher I’m often asked to describe the United States and Americans, and for as long as I can remember, the first word that has come to mind is: independent. We love to feel independent! Independent financially, politically, emotionally; in our families, in our workplace, and in the world. Many of us longed to “be out on our own” at a very young age, and most Americans follow that course throughout their lives. We love expressions like “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” and “stand on your own two feet”. In our culture, there is an immense pride in (and often an expectation to) figure things out on our own. Whether this comes from the pioneer spirit of our history or from Hollywood’s “steal the spotlight” mentality, we can see the strong value placed on independence in all aspects of American lives. From our first declaration as a prospective country to our preference for ordering individual, non-shared meals, we focus every day on our individuality and personal independence, and if ever we feel it’s being threatened, look out.

#2 Entertainment

EntertainmentYou might have noticed that I didn’t get very far into this post without mentioning Hollywood. As much as many Americans like to think of that place as somehow “other”, the truth is, we are massive consumers (and producers) of entertainment, all thanks to Tinseltown. In fact, many of my students from all over the world have surprised me with facts and details about life in the US that were gleaned entirely from our movies and TV; some have even confessed that’s how they started learning English or even why they continue today. Of course, what they see in the movies is not always true to American life, but there are definitely many of our values and perspectives shared through our obsession with entertainment. It’s hard to imagine America without movie trailers, award shows, film conventions, and dedicated fandoms. As someone who hasn’t seen such American classics as the Godfather, Stars Wars, or Top Gun, I’ve been described a few times as “simply unamerican”, but I promise I’ll get to them eventually!

#3 Direct

Being told I’m unamerican (even jokingly) to my face brings me to my next Americanism. We are a direct people. After living in China for a few years, I know this to be absolutely true of Americans. We like to be told upfront, no matter what it is, and often regardless of how it’s said. I’ve heard people refer to Americans as blunt or straightforward, and although we aren’t always trying to be, we are often quite direct in our daily lives. Imagine communicating with someone (a family member, a colleague, or even a stranger) and not being able to figure out what they mean. You would probably want to shake them and say “stop beating around the bush” or “just break it to me”. We have a certain intolerance for ambiguousness coupled with the idea that things should be said and done as efficiently as possible, feelings be damned. This is why in our culture it’s perfectly normal to decline invitations or to challenge a superior. We would rather ruffle some feathers right off the bat than leave things vague or unclear.

#4 Patriotic

PatrioticAnother trait that I associate with America is our deep patriotism. We love our flag, our national anthem, and the values that we have long attached to our country, such as freedom, perseverance, and justice. Although patriotism means something a little different to each of us, as Americans this is our home, and we feel a certain pride and responsibility in that. Whether we show these feelings by hanging a flag outside our house, voting in every election, or representing our values abroad, we all like to feel that we have a role to play for America, and we’re happy to do it. Perhaps because we grew up with stories of how hard our forefathers, suffragettes, and civil rights activists fought for us to have what we have today, the sense that we need to take up the baton and continue to work for a better homeland has been deeply instilled. Or who knows, maybe it was just hearing that Lee Greenwood song year after year.

#5 Dreamers

DreamersAlthough this word has taken on new meaning and significance in the last few years, the American Dream and the people who embody it are not new, nor I think are they bound by political lines. America was founded on dreams: dreams of a new nation, dreams of equal representation, dreams of prosperity. We can still hear the US referred to as a “Land of Opportunity” from both inside and out. We love the fact that “if you can dream it, you can do it”, and thanks to our lack of a formal class system, many Americans have been able to make it happen all throughout our history. Most of us have immigrants in our ancestry, which is maybe one of the most classic versions of the American Dream. Others have seen their dreams come true in regards to socioeconomic status or overall success. Just like independence, Americans value people who dream big and work hard to make it happen. In short, we believe dreams can come true.

#6 Divided

Divided 2Dreams are wonderful, but all dreams are based in some sort of reality. And for Americans, right now that reality is a strong division. Party lines are more evident than ever, generation gaps and racial divides exist, and there’s no doubt that whatever the topic of conversation, people tend to divide up into various groups or “sides”. We have the Left and the Right, Boomers and Millennials, white collar and blue collar, Black and white, gay and straight, religious and non-religious, and so many other labels that, like it or not, separate us in some way from our fellow Americans. Although we are the “United” States and a supposed “Melting Pot”, many events have recently been shining a spotlight on our divisions and differences instead. Diversity can often beget division, or at least the perception of division, but I think we’re all also aware of the classic “United we stand; divided we fall”. Trends change everyday, and we can change as well.

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At least Atlanta can be pretty United!

#7 Private

Another American feature that stands out to me is our penchant for privacy. On the whole, Americans are quite private (even with the growing popularity of oversharing on social media). We like privacy fences and secure passwords, and we fear Alexa and Siri are gleaning too much information from us. We have all sorts of privacy laws and generally feel that keeping things to ourselves is one of our inalienable rights. I often have students ask me “how old are you?”, “how much do you make?”, “why don’t you have kids?” and other such questions that, as an American, leave me feeling like my privacy has been breached. We talk about “personal boundaries” and “invasions of privacy” fairly regularly – both in the physical and figurative senses. It’s typically very clear to Americans where “the line” is and our use of small talk often demonstrates it: weather, sports, family members – all good; religion, politics, or anything “too personal”, strictly off the table.

#8 Friendly

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Super friendly (and patriotic)

Although we might like keeping things to ourselves at times, we are usually still quite good at small talk and making friends. From the outside looking in, Americans are often viewed as very friendly. We’re often smiling for no reason, making jokes with strangers about the broken elevator, or lending a hand in the form of opening doors for others or picking up something that has been dropped. Basically, we’re masters at “Meet-Cute Stories”. I think the reason we often come across as overly friendly is because we’re all pretty much willing to do these things regardless of where we are, who we’re with, or what we’re doing. We also tend to retell these little anecdotes throughout the rest of our day: “I ran into a man at the gas station, and you’ll never guess what he said…”, “Sorry, I’m late. I was chatting with a woman outside.”, etc. And don’t even get me started on what it’s like when two Americans meet while abroad; you’d think they had just met their long-lost cousin!

#9 Isolated

The US is big and only has two neighbors, a bit of a rarity in terms of geography, and these facts play into my next feature of “Americanness”: isolation. A large portion of Americans never feel the need to leave their homeland (and why would they with the bounty of things to do and see right at home?) or even keep track of what’s going on outside of their immediate surroundings. However, this tendency to face inward seems to contribute to a bit of ignorance about the rest of the world. You might have seen Jimmy Kimmel testing Americans on world geography, which as a geography nerd, definitely makes me cringe, but unlike other countries whose histories and even present day dealings have required a much more thorough knowledge of their surrounding nations, for Americans, it has rarely mattered (of course with increasing globalization that is changing every day). However, regardless of the underlying reasons, Americans can definitely be said to be “in our own little world”.

#10 Innovative

InnovativePerhaps because we’ve always been in our own little world, the US has also been a hotbed for inventiveness and creativity right from its start. From Thomas Edison and Clara Barton to Bill Gates and Katie Bouman, Americans have contributed a great deal to global innovation. Even the average American likes to think and talk about the future, and we always, as Walt Disney famously said, “keep moving forward”. It’s no wonder our people were among the first to take to the skies, race to space, and create all types of digital media. We simply love to take risks and try something new. We have the phrase “necessity is the mother of invention”, but in America, it might not even require necessity.

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Who could ever forget this incredible innovation?

So that’s my list. Of course, there are about a hundred words I sifted through before deciding on these ten! America is complicated; culture is complicated! And we can’t always fit everything into ten neat little categories. But maybe we can agree that reflection and openness can be great for developing a better understanding of ourselves and our communities. I would love to see some of the words you would add to your “America in 10 Words” list, or if you’re from another country, what words would you assign to your culture? We have a lot we can learn from each other’s perspectives, and I can’t wait to continue shifting mine!

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